A year ago, we were just finishing up our group training in preparation for the kids coming into our lives. Detailed accounts of those sessions were recorded in earlier posts, but lately we have drawn upon the lessons from those excited weekends for some confirmation of what we will focus on as we grow together into a family of 3+ (plus? - plus chickens!).
After being taught some of the key things to keep in mind while we're attempting to guide our kids through life in the real world, we were tasked with developing a statement about what our family will stand for, a set of core values, a mission statement. This creates a place from where all of our decisions and actions can take root. If we guide our lives with our basic core family values, then our actions will demonstrate our beliefs. So, the challenge was to figure out what we want our actions to say about what we value as a family.
This was no easy task. I'm never good at selecting a favorite anything. The password hints I choose for on-line services are never the "favorite film" or "favorite book" options. I am just incapable of narrowing down the full list of what I've enjoyed in life to one succinct answer. I am always anxious that I'll leave something out that actually had as profound of an impact on me as the one I listed.
When asked what specific values we will turn to as we endeavor to guide a child through this crazy world, the list was long, and growing. I mean, isn't it the goal to get all things positive and genuine into their little hearts, minds and souls and then somehow teach them to deal with all the negative stuff in the best way possible? Right, so what are the best ways possible? Or, what will be our way? The tricky part is not to rewrite the thesaurus in an effort to make sure you didn't leave out any important attribute you want to instill. Here's where we stopped (not that it's complete or anything):
Our family values love, support, patience, kindness, trust, communication and humor.
We invite friends and family into our home as a place to feel comfort, peace and laughter.
We believe in giving to others.
We respect and nurture the planet and all of its inhabitants.
We seek a diversity of new experiences in order to continue learning.
Even as I look at it now, I see things I want to change. But, we hope they'll get the picture and learn to be good to others and themselves. For our part, we will try to continue to absorb these statements into our beings and embody them as we muck through reality. After all, we are reminded daily that patience might be one of our values, but it's not one we've mastered yet.
