Rockville Hills Park, CA - where I mentioned never having seen a snake before in an earlier post.
Today, we saw two! (but not rattlers)

More time in these oak forested hills today has me feeling a heightened need to stay grounded. The spiral away from control of anything in our lives right now is particularly intense today. There is absolutely nothing new to update, good or bad, it's just one of those days I guess.

 

This blog was intended to provide a peek into the journey we're on. Sometimes that will be about the process and sometimes it will be about the feelings. Today, I'm struggling with the fact that things feel drastically different from one minute to the next. Not that they are; nothing has changed at all. Sometimes we feel like we better not leave the house without all of our belongings because T will likely call us to the hospital any minute. Five minutes later, we're planning what we're going to do next weekend because she is likely never going to have a baby. Honestly, never? How can that be possible? Still, that's what it feels like.

 

At least tomorrow is another day packed full of surrounding ourselves with beloved family and friends at another hosted brunch and dinner out. The weekend visits are a distraction from the focus, the intensity of which can be overwhelming sometimes. Still, I find when I've spent too much time away from my thoughts of the coming weeks, I miss the daydream.

 

This whirlwind of emotions can only be tamed by a concentrated effort to meditate on the roots of a 100 year old tree in the ground. For that, I am grateful to be surrounded by these beautiful oaks at every turn.